Woody Allen Quotes on Identity
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I'm not really the heroic type. I was beat up by Quakers.
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Boris: (a) Socrates is a man.(b) All men are mortal.(c) All men are Socrates. That means all men are homosexuals. I'm not a homosexual. Once, some Cossacks whistled at me. I happen to have the kind of body that excites both persuasions.
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Of all the famous men who ever lived, the one I would most like to have been was Socrates. Not just because he was a great thinker, because I have been known to have some reasonably profound insights myself, although mine invariably revolve around a Swedish airline stewardess and some handcuffs.
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[On being called a self-hating Jew] Hey, I may hate myself, but not because I'm Jewish.
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My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.