Scott Adams Quotes on Humor
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There's nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.
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You might think the word 'homemade' is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.
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We know the goats are imported because they don't speak English.
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If you think it's easy to write jokes about fried calamari, you've probably never tried.
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If you have questions about this salad, give your server the spinach inquisition.
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Named after the great romaine emperor, Julius Salad.
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This sandwich used to include endive, but no one wanted to eat a BELT.
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Our salmon sandwiches are so good you'll want to swim upstream to our kitchen and spawn. But please don't.
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If our mushrooms make you hallucinate, please inform us immediately so we can overcharge you.
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We use only the finest days of the week in this dish.
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Stacey puts a little love in each pasta shell. But it's self-love, so it won't help you that much.
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Biblical scholars tell us that this is the same meal that Jesus ate at the last supper. But hey, I'm sure you have a good reason for ordering something else.
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Our scallops are so delicious your mouth will thank you, which is creepy because your mouth can actually talk.