13 Scott Adams Quotes on Humor

Scott Adams quotes on humor

10. There's nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.

12. You might think the word 'homemade' is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.

13. We know the goats are imported because they don't speak English.

14. If you think it's easy to write jokes about fried calamari, you've probably never tried.

15. If you have questions about this salad, give your server the spinach inquisition.

16. Named after the great romaine emperor, Julius Salad.

18. This sandwich used to include endive, but no one wanted to eat a BELT.

19. Our salmon sandwiches are so good you'll want to swim upstream to our kitchen and spawn. But please don't.

20. If our mushrooms make you hallucinate, please inform us immediately so we can overcharge you.

21. We use only the finest days of the week in this dish.

24. Stacey puts a little love in each pasta shell. But it's self-love, so it won't help you that much.

25. Biblical scholars tell us that this is the same meal that Jesus ate at the last supper. But hey, I'm sure you have a good reason for ordering something else.

26. Our scallops are so delicious your mouth will thank you, which is creepy because your mouth can actually talk.