150 Vince McMahon Quotes

Vince McMahon quotes

1. 'Welcome everyone to Monday Night RAW!'

2. '...And tonight, for one night only, the home of the World Wrestling Federation' (when introducing Pay-Per-View event)

3. 'Anything can happen in the WWF!' (or World Wrestling Federation)

4. 'Only in the WWF you can see this!'

5. 'The boyhood dream has come true for Shawn Michaels; Shawn Michaels: the World Wrestling Federation champion! It has happened at WrestleMania!'

6. 'But now please stand in recognition of the World Wrestling Federation Champion' (before Bret's entrance in WM12)

7. 'A cover, a count and a win' (pinfall)

8. 'Ladies and gentlemen...welcome to the magnificent Silverdome...and welcome to WrestleMania III!!

9. ' one TWOO AAAAAND no.'

10. 'Oh my! What a manuever!'

11. 'Oh my goodness!'

12. 'Un-belIEVABLE!!'

13. 'Let's take a look at some of the events that led up to this exciting match-up we're about to see'

14. 'Forget about it!' (Usually said after witnessing an impressive move or circumstance that could end the match)

15. 'He did not!' (Whenever heel co-commentator suggests a babyface used 'heel tactics')

16. 'Oh come on'

17. 'Well that remains to be seen'

18. 'There's only one Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michaels...oh wow! Look at that!'- Shawn Michaels' entrance at WrestleMania 12

19. 'You can't even say it!' (To Jerry Lawler when he stuttered and couldn't pronouce 'World Wrestling Federation Championship')

20. 'Baaaaaaaaaaack body-drop!'

21. 'One, two and three, he got him, no he didn't' (often suffixed with 'I can't believe he didn't get him')

22. 'No one gets up from that'

23. 'That'll do it!' (generally after a transitional move has been hit, rather than a finisher)

24. 'Come on ref, get in there'

25. 'No he has not been eliminated, you have to go over the top-rope and both feet must hit the arena floor' (repeated many times during Royal Rumble match)

26. 'Oh really?'

27. 'Ha-HA-HAAAAA!' (Often when either Bret Hart hands out his shades, or following a Doink 'joke')

28. 'See-saw match-up, back-and-forth!'

29. 'Action outside the ring, action inside the ring!'

30. 'I've got balls the size of grapefruits, and come this Sunday you'll be spitting out the seeds!'

31. '...because I'm Vince McMahon, damn it!'

32. 'Thank you, thank you very much!'

33. 'YYYYYYYOU'RE FFFFFIRED!'

34. 'Tonight, in this very ring...'

35. 'I ALWAYS win.'

36. 'Nobody yells at me. I'm Vincent Kennedy McMahon. I yell at YOU!'

37. 'SHUT UP!'

38. 'RING THE DAMN BELL!'

39. 'I'M THE BOSS!'

    Attribution disputed; shown as originally published.

40. 'I created Hulkamania. And I will destroy it'

41. 'You've got no chance in hell.'

42. 'That's just too damn bad'

43. 'He's gonna PUKE!'

44. 'I've got an insatiable appetite for life and a lot more! MORE! MORE!'

45. 'I'm gonna give you my billionaire BITCH slap!'

46. 'Get me security'

47. 'No more Mr. Nice Guy'

    Attribution disputed; shown as originally published.

48. 'Screw unto others before they screw above to you'

49. 'Excuse me while I whip this out!'

50. 'You don't cross the boss.'

51. 'Go ahead and kiss my magnificent ass. Go ahead. DAMMIT! YOU KISS MY ASS NOW!'

52. 'That was a $10,000 microphone!'

53. 'DAMMIT! Austin, come back and give me a stunner!'

54. 'Life sucks, and then you die!'

55. 'What about the money?'

56. 'I'm The Genetic Jackhammer!'

57. 'Who the hell do you think you are?'

58. 'In the interest of fairness.'

59. 'Suprise, surprise!'

60. 'Nobody says no to Vince McMahon! Nobody! Not you, not them or anyone! It's in your contract!'

61. 'Bobby Lashley says that WrestleMania 23 was the best night of his life. Well at Backlash it will be the worst night of his life!'

62. 'Kiss it Shawn! Kiss It, you like it! Come on! Yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!' (When Shawn Michaels became a member of the kiss my ass club thanks to Shane)

63. 'I am the lord, the master and god, of all sports entertainment!'

64. 'McMahonism is the theology of the masses!'

65. 'Blessed be the name of Vincent Kennedy McMahon!'

66. 'Hope You're still listening, God.'

67. 'It's at least the devil that you know, as compared to the devils you don't.'

68. 'And now Austin: Austin, now you know. There is no price, I will not pay. There is no depth, that I will not stoop, to make your life on Earth, Austin, a total, complete, living HELL!'

69. 'You wanna humiliate me?! Huh?! Look at me! You did this! You did this! Well you may have not lost your ECW Title, but it will be on the line at Backlash when it will be Bobby Lashley versus Umaga versus Shane McMahon versus VINCENT KENNEDY McMAHON! The ECW Championship comes to the McMahons!'

70. 'I'm the new ECW Champion! I can feel it in my bones!'

71. 'What up, homes?!' (Towards then WWE Champion, John Cena)

72. 'I'm the King of Extreme!'

73. 'I don't know about that suicidal crap.' (About Sabu)

74. 'If you can win tonight, then maybe you can get a shot at the WWE Championship. And when you're done with that, maybe you can go for the big one. Peace out, my brothas!' (walks off; he was talking to Shawn Michaels, and John Cena was there as well)

75. 'I'm the Doctor of Hardcore!'

76. 'The last time I was here, well you can say I was blown up to smithereens! Now many of you people are wondering, 'Why would you set up your demise?' Well I wanted you people to see how you really care about me.' (About faking his kayfabe death)

77. 'I gotta find away to get my family back.'

78. 'And now I hear I have a illegitimate child! I don't even know who this woman is!'

79. 'That woman should of been put on the pill!'

80. 'I just gotta know who my bastard son is.'

81. 'You ungrateful bitch!' (Towards Melina)

82. 'It's about one thing, and that one thing is...DA MON-AAY! It's all about...DA MON-AAY!'

83. 'Thank god it's not another daughter!'

84. 'You want me to change? I can change. I know I can be a better father and a better husband.' (Towards his family)

85. 'I hate you! I wish you never came back!' (towards Triple H)

86. Triple H and Mr. McMahon bantering about his illegitimate son; the conversation momentarily switches to animal talk

87. 'Stop talking in riddles! Who's my son!?' (towards Mr. Johnson, the attorney for the mother of Mr. McMahon's illegitimate son)

88. 'He's a child and he has to sit in a car seat.' (Talking about Hornswoggle to Coachman)

89. 'I'm putting you up for adoption.' (Towards Hornswoggle)

90. 'You're a disgrace to the McMahon family! Now get out of my life! I never want to see you! Ever!' (Towards Hornswoggle)

91. 'Ric Flair will never retire! I like that. Well you will never retire as long as you keep on winning! You understand what I'm saying? As long as you keep on winning. The next time you lose a match your career is over!' (Talking to Ric Flair about is career threatening matches)

92. I'm gonna beat the holy hell out of my son! (Talking about his match against Hornswoggle)

93. Linda: 'Vince, let's talk business.' Vince: 'Linda: the first thing that I would like to say, I would like to publicly say to my wife Linda that I love you.' Linda: 'And Vince, I love you. But in your own words, Vince, love has nothing to do with business.' Vince: 'Wait a minute. Y-y-you don't want: you don't want to go there.' Linda: 'Oh, yes I do want to go there. Yes I do.'

94. 'We here at World Wrestling Entertainment wish you the best in your future endeavors.'

95. 'You're fired.'

96. 'I want a divorce!'

97. 'Vince, shut up. I'm the one doing the talking in this ring tonight.'

98. 'I don't play CEO, I AM the CEO!'

99. 'Vince, as far as I'm concerned, you no longer have a home.' (after catching him talking about his 'numerous affairs' during the Mr. McMahon Strikes Back storyline)

100. 'You gotta eat lightning and crap thunder!'

     Attribution disputed; shown as originally published.

101. 'Which way did the Big Show Go?'

102. 'Here comes the money!'

103. 'It was me; It was me dad that hired Stone Cold back! It was me!'

104. (to Kane) 'Burn in Hell, you son of a bitch'

105. (to Kane) 'HAVE A NICE RIDE!'

106. (to Kane) 'You're not evil. You're pathetic. You see, you're scared. I can see it in your eyes. I know it, everyone else knows it. As a matter of fact, even your own brother knows it.'

107. 'Yours Truly, Shane O Mac.'

108. 'Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: except for Mr. McMahon and his disciple.' (during the McMahons-in-church episode, reading a McMahonism mock rendition of Psalm 23

109. 'You see, I told you that Shane McMahon was not the greater power. But you didn't want to believe me. Well now: maybe you do.' (appears at stage; during revelation of Corporate Ministry's Higher Power)

110. 'The greater power is cold and calculated and a mastermind at screwing with people's minds. The greater power is also a master planner. The greater power: is methodical in his methods, and a master in human psychology. The greater power knows what makes all of us tick, each and every one of us! He knows our fears, he knows our strengths and our weaknesses, and exploits those fears, strengths, and weaknesses for the betterment of his Corporate Ministry and his own personal amusement. So who is this greater power? Let's reveal this greater power to the entire world!'

111. 'Shane O Mac is back!'

112. 'Yo yo yo, what hell is this?'

113. (King of The Ring 2001 Interview) 'I'm da WWF's bump machine!'

114. (Everybody are irking) 'SHUUUUT UUUP!!'

115. 'I'm a fouth generation McMahon! My sons are the fifth generation and they're at home now.'

116. (to Vince) 'Dad, all you care about is daddy's little girl.' (referring to Steph)

117. (to Chris Jericho) 'This man who happens to be my Dad is an asshole!' (referring to Vince)

118. 'What is UP!'

119. 'X - Punk!'

120. 'You see, Dad, it's always been about what you like, what you want-- even at the expense of your own family. I did love Andrew-- but I wasn't ready to get married. That's what-- that's what YOU wanted. And you know what, Dad? I'm not 'Daddy's little girl' anymore.I'm doing things my way, and it feels DAMN GOOD. You know, I have to admit, I used to get butterflies when Triple H would look at me... I didn't want to; I didn't really mean to, but just the way he would stand up to you; he was so... strong, and, and powerful. And he outsmarted you by making business personal. And that's something you know all about, Dad, isn't it-- making business personal. Oh-- oh, you look confused, like you don't remember. I guess it's been a long time-- it's, it's been almost a year since you had me ABDUCTED.You had me locked in a rat-infested basement with no light-- I thought no one was coming for me-- you put me there. YOU put me there. Then you had someone rifle through all of my personal and private things in my bedroom. I didn't know what, what kind of person had been in through all of my PRIVATE things.YOU made them do it; YOU did. But then, the icing on the cake. You had me strapped to a symbol and carried down to this ring to be sacrificed to the Undertaker in a wedding. You did it. I was sacrificed, all right-- at my father's expense-- simply so you could screw Stone Cold Steve Austin. But you know what, Daddy? Like I said a couple of weeks ago on SmackDown-- what goes around, comes around. You hurt me. And what's the best way that I could hurt you back? By marrying the man that you hate the most-- my husband, Triple H-- Hunter Hearst Helmsley.Oh, oh, and by the way! Dad, just so you know-- Triple H really TURNS ME ON!' (During her first heel turn in the WWE when she betrayed then baby face, Vince McMahon and kayfabe married then heel, Triple H)

121. 'Dad: Dad, Shane: how could you be so cruel to me?' (the night Vince revealed himself as the Corporate Ministry's Higher Power)

122. 'I've got bigger balls than every man in this arena!'

123. 'The bitch is back!'

124. 'All of you are jealous, because I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth!'

125. 'I will not quit! Not now not ever!' (This was during her latest face run as Smackdown! GM and her feud with her father, Vince)

126. 'Welcome to Smackdown-Is-Stephanie!'

127. 'Cause I am that damn good!' (copied from her at the time on-screen husband Triple H)

128. 'There's no doubt that you're a bitch, but tonight, you're going to be my bitch!' (to Trish Stratus)

129. 'Now, some of you might feel that Mr. McMahon doesn't deserve a celebration. Mr. McMahon was not loved. He was not sympathetic, and he was not kind. But the man you know as Mr. McMahon is the only man I have ever known as my dad. And my dad is the most important person in this world:' (stops to correct herself) ':was.'

130. 'I love you dad.' (closing statement in her promo one week after Vince McMahon's kayfabe tragic death; she rather unconvincingly tried to cry afterwards as she left the ring.)

131. My half brother or half sister, your bastard child is a WWE Superstar. (Towards Vince during the McMahon Strikes Back storyline)

132. Stephanie walks into her and Triple H's room and catches Triple H showing Trish Stratus finishing moves

133. 'There's only room for one dominate female in the Mcmahon Family and thats me.'

134. 'Kurt Angle's body will hit the floor! The WWF's bodies will hit the floor!'

135. 'Shut up, Shut up!' (Towards Chris Jericho after he makes fun of her)

136. 'We said we told you so, but we told you so.'

137. Jess McMahon (Vince's Grandfather)

138. Vincent James McMahon (Vince's Father)

139. Marissa Mazzola-McMahon (Shane's Wife)

140. Paul Levesque (Triple H) (Stephanie's Husband)

1. I don't like to sleep. I'm missing something when I'm sleeping.

2. The next thing you're going to tell me is Daniel Bryan is the United States Champion.

3. If you stop building stars, which we never do, you wouldn't be in business.

4. I think there are certain business matters which we must now conduct differently than we used to.

5. So, I get a kick out of working with the media.

6. I do think the standards of the media have dropped to an all-time low in terms of credibility.

7. I got balls the size of grapefruits!

8. Regardless of how well a studio is run, it's only as good as the product it produces.

9. The key, of course, is to stay away from the losing years.

10. I think that the Internet - and I do love the free flow of ideas on the 'Net - is like the wild west of the information world.