George Carlin Quotes on Life
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It's all bullshit, folks, and it's bad for ya.
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Once you leave the womb, conservatives don't care about you until you reach military age. Then you're just what they're looking for. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers.
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I never eat sushi. I have trouble eating things that are merely unconscious.
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Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
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I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it.
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I go to bed early; my favorite dream comes on at nine.
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Property is theft. Nobody 'owns' anything. When you die, it all stays here.