Eddie Izzard Quotes on Politics
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There's no Church of England fundamentalism. We can't have Church of England fundamentalism. You know, like they have Islamic fundamentalism. Jihad! : Ah ha :
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'That's one saved fucking queen! It shouldn't be 'God save the queen,' it should be 'God attack the queen!' 'God attack the queen/Send big dogs after her/That bite her bum. Let them chase after her, And rip her knickers off...''
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After the war, there was this feeling of no empire no longer : 'All right, come on, Europe, give these countries back. Britain?' 'What?' 'What's that behind your back?' 'Oh, it's India and a number of other countries.' 'Give them back.' 'Oh, all right. This one goes here and that one there. Oh, we need the Falkland Islands : for strategic sheep purposes.'
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Japan and Germany should be the peacekeepers of the world. They should be parachuted in whenever something breaks out. Parachute Germans and Japanese in. They go, 'Look, we've done this before, we've done the killing. Hello? Take it from us. Just chill, chill out!' And then they organise peace really efficiently: 'Peace, peace, peace - peace is organized!'
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The European Union: five hundred million people, two hundred languages - no one's got a clue what they're saying to each other!
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Prince Phillip, he's a card! Has a habit of saying things like, 'You're all a bunch of fuckers! Oops!'. And he said to students visiting China, 'Don't stay here too long, you'll get all slitty-eyed!', then, 'Was that wrong? Oh, I'm sorry :'