6 George Carlin Quotes on Sexuality

George Carlin quotes on sexuality

5. Have you noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are women you wouldn't want to fuck in the first place, man? There's such balance in nature.

37. Here would be a good name for a gay restaurant: The Mouthful. Oh come on, that's clever shit! That's a double pun, God damn it; you didn't think of it! Besides, you don't have to eat there if you don't want to. No. Just go in, have a cocktail. Or a Highball.

49. Here's something you never hear a man say: 'Stop sucking my dick or I'll call the police!'

51. Now apparently, some people don't know what a pussy-fart is. Because I got some inquiries. Here's the deal: a pussy fart is like when you're making love to a woman who's got a little extra air in her vagina. So every time you thrust forward, it's kind of a : [makes various farting noises] And each of you is lying in bed, wondering if the other one farted. And the man is usually thinking, 'Maybe she farts when she cums. Maybe she took a shit. Man, I've got to stay out of that fucking bar.'

68. I don't understand why prostitution is illegal. Selling is legal. Fucking is legal. Why isn't selling fucking legal? You know, why should it be illegal to sell something that's perfectly legal to give away? I can't follow the logic on that one at all! Of all the things you can do, giving someone an orgasm is hardly the worst thing in the world. In the army they give you a medal for spraying napalm on people! In civilian life you go to jail for giving someone an orgasm!

194. 69 : 71, which is 69 with two fingers up your ass : 68, which is 'You do me an' I'll owe you one.' Women hear that one all the time!