George Carlin Quotes on Wordplay
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And, of course, the funniest food: 'kumquats'. I don't even bring them home. I sit there laughing and they go to waste.
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Here would be a good name for a gay restaurant: The Mouthful. Oh come on, that's clever shit! That's a double pun, God damn it; you didn't think of it! Besides, you don't have to eat there if you don't want to. No. Just go in, have a cocktail. Or a Highball.
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Atheism: a non-prophet organization.
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Why do people say 'I'm going to take a shit'? : They don't take a shit, they leave one.
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You can prick your finger, just don't finger your prick.