3 Mitch Hedberg Quotes on Value

Mitch Hedberg quotes on value

24. I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the fucker gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the fucker gave me the 'donate it to charity' slice. I would like to exchange this for the 'keep it!'[4]

36. I bought a seven dollar pen because I always lose pens and I got sick of not caring.

55. I saw some two-dollar bills, today. They were for sale for eight dollars. Something went severely wrong there. What happened? It spun out of control. Now it's worth eight, still says 'two'.