12 Phil Hendrie Quotes on Safety

Phil Hendrie quotes on safety

4. Careful Granny you might pop something

90. It is necessary for me to drink and drive.

131. I was sleep-raped.

156. At my church that's what they say, 'Today, we offer our condolences to the Berger family; they rolled a three. Its very sad and tr-tragic, but that's what happens when you don't wear a seatbelt.'

224. If you were here, you wouldn't have any eyes left.

236. You don't park a group of retards near a road and expect them not to be nailed by a flying Dodge Durango.

246. If you're on a luxury cruise ship, and a gentleman passenger commits suicide and jumps off the ship - he didn't fall off, he didn't slip, he didn't trip, it wasn't an accident - he purposely jumped off the side of the cruise ship with the sole intention of ending his life by suicide, do you bring the ship to a dead stop, reverse the screws as they like to say - back up that ship and search for that man, even if it means inconveniencing passengers who had their hearts set on the Dutch Antillies?

307. What? My landing gear's still down and my tires are crooked? Ah, screw it, I'm bringing it in anyway.

320. (Explaining why he doesn't personally deliver food to the needy) You don't go down there; you gonna die if you go down there. You might think you doing a good thing but you'll be dead of a gunshot wound before you even get the frozen dinner out of your car.

331. A full-cavity search is non-invasive; we practice on ourselves.

384. I'm gonna rape Katie Couric, I'm gonna rape Oprah Winfrey, I'm gonna rape Greta Van Susteren, I'm gonna rape the Federal Prosecutor, come through the phone, kick your ass.

385. I will find Katie Couric and I will commit the act of rape on her. And then when I'm done with her, I'll get on that news women they got on the air and, who the other one? Oh yeah, Greta Van Susteren, I will rape her.