5 Steven Wright Quotes on Health

Steven Wright quotes on health

7. About a year ago, my girlfriend was on the pill, wearing a diaphragm, and an IUD all at once. Recently, she had a baby; baby was born wearing armor.

41. I hate when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it's going to be up all night.

118. I like my dental hygienist. I think she's very pretty. So when I'm waiting in her office I eat an entire bag of Oreo cookies. Sometimes she has to cancel all her other appointments.

189. I'm totally insane. I'm so wired. I'm sweating internally.

196. The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.